Now that's hot
My daddy once told me there is nothing sadder than watching a fat man cry, so I’m sure the people of Guangzhou think I’m the saddest man around. As Gareth pointed out it’s the dog days of summer all over China but for those of us in the south it’s especially miserable. The tropical humidity is a torment upon the senses as I sweat from one air conditioned building to another. You really have to pace yourself or you will look like you’ve been out in the rain instead of just going out for a quick bite to eat.
In my opinion the worst part of Guangzhou’s heat is the fact that you get sick from the air conditioner. That’s right folks the only thing keeping me from dying of heat stroke is also the reason I’ve already had two lung infections. Going from hot and humid to cold and dry really has put my body through hell this summer. Yet while I suffer I see the Chinese here in Guangzhou chattering along happily as I flop like a fish to find a taxi.
I have sweat dripping into my eyes making me squeal and writhe as I try to find a taxi half blind and suffocating from the humid air. As soon as I finally find a taxi he waves me off cause he’s headed back to the station. Oh my luck, yesterday alone I spent nearly an hour drowning outside trying to catch a taxi across town.
Oh and let’s not forget the joy of living in a concrete jungle. The 38 degree heat soaking into the concrete like a sponge, and then the concrete spits it back at you as you are standing there on the street. Everything becomes a heat source as well as a source of annoyance. Should you be brave enough to sit down you find your ass has sat in a frying pan. And if you just stand there you end up feeling like you are in a sauna with the heat vapors beating you down. So my advice, keep moving and remember to stay hydrated for god’s sake.
I’m surprised the street vendors haven’t taken advantage of the heat radiating off of objects and just started cooking on the sidewalk or some iron railing. Cheap, effective, and let’s face it most Chinese aren’t worried about the sanitary aspect of any cooking. I can almost smell the stinky tofu roasting on the sidewalk now. Oh I think I’m making myself ill.
The problem with Guangzhou also is that the heat won’t end. Once it’s nice and cool in Suzhou and Hangzhou. It will still be scorching well into November. I still remember going from Hangzhou to Guangzhou and back to Hangzhou. In a matter of a week there was a huge difference between the two places. So while we are all suffering from this infernal heat take heart that your torture is nearly over while mine feels like it’s only beginning.
I believe that you are going through your own personal hell there right now, your own personal 6 months a year hell, albeit a hell that is a whole lot wetter than the original version. Frankly I've read Gareth's blog about the heat and humidity of Suzhou, and between you and me I think Gareth is a bit of a wuss, but don't tell him I said so. My guess is that Suzhou is a lot like Hangzhou - hot compared to Canada, sure, but like a northern spring compared to Guangzhou.